Now for the fine print: â€œBaconâ€ shall hereafter refer to the cured and smoked fatty cuts of pork, either back, side or belly. In other words â€œAmerican baconâ€. No â€œCanadian baconâ€, which is really just lunchmeat. No pork chops. No turkey bacon. No â€œtofaconâ€ or any such horror. Just bacon.
No condiments allowed. No syrups, or hot sauces, or pureed vegetables in the form of ketchup. No sauces at all. Just natureâ€™s finest bacon, all by its dignified self.
I am making allowances for the following beverages: beer, wine, martinis and water. No juices, no V8, nothing that could be construed as â€œhealthyâ€. This is somewhat arbitrary, I grant you, but one bit of madness at a time, is my reasoning.
good luck dude